Page 61 of The Other Side of Wild
“When you were ignoring me, I felt like maybe I really wasn’t enough. But I told myself you just needed time and space to process. So, I just brushed it off the best I could.” Her heavy sigh hurts, but I know she needs to get that she needs to say out, too.
“When I walked into your parent’s house and heard you write me off like that, I wish I could tell you it just rolled off my back. But that would make me a liar. It landed like a fatal blow. I don’t remember much of anything after that. I don’t even remember driving home. It’s like I completely blacked out. Everything he had said all those years ago was brought to fruition when those words left your mouth.”
Her voice breaks, and the tears streaming down her face have me wanting to get on my knees and beg for forgiveness that I don’t deserve. “Hannah, I’m so sorry.” I croak, “as soon as I woke up in the hospital, all I wanted was to wrap myself up in you, but I was so full of guilt and shame I thought you'd be better off without me around, at least until I got myself together. I missed you so much; when my mom mentioned you, all the feelings I had tried to suppress bubbled to the surface, and I snapped. I said what I thought would get her to stop bringing you up because it drove the knife deeper each time she did.”
She rolls into me and buries her face in my chest; my hand runs up and down her spine. “You don’t know how much I regret it.” I whisper into her hair. “I’d take a career-ending injury over ever hurting you like that again. I meant it when I said I’d always come for you; I’ll always fight for you. You are mine, Hannah. And I’m yours. I have been from the moment I ran into you. Every single day, I’ll fight to prove that.”
“The second you looked up at me from the floor, fire burning in your eyes, clearly only concerned about saving your coffee, I started dreaming again.” I smile as I recall all the small details I let myself indulge in over the past few months. “I let myself imagine the life I’ve always wanted, one that starred you and me. I pictured all the ways I could bring out that challenging eyebrow you aimed in my direction. How I could get you to look at me the way you did in our interview.” She takes a breath that shakes her whole body; I know she’s crying. I pull her in tighter, moving my hand from her back to her hair.
“Then I got to know you and realized you’re everything I've ever prayed for. You're so kind, generous, and driven. I want to be the one to step in and take care of you. I want to be the one who you call when you need someone; I want to be the one to stand by you when you question yourself, the one who reminds you just how freaking special you are.” Stopping to take a breath, I run my fingertips across her scalp a few times.
“You are my end game, Hannah Lowery. And I won’t stop trying to prove that to you until your name is Hannah Wilder. And then I’ll spend the rest of my life reminding you of how much I love you.” Her gasp isn’t audible from where she’s buried her face in my shirt, but I feel it.
Slowly, she pulled her face away and looked up at me, her face drenched. But I already knew that from the Hannah-sized wet spot on my chest. “You mean it?” It’s a shaky whisper, but it’s filled with hope.
“Every word. You’re it for me. And I pray to God, you’ll give me a chance to prove it.” She’s silent as she searches for my face, no doubt trying to pick up on any hesitation. But she won’t find any; I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. A watery smile crosses her face, and she nods. I feel like I just wonthe lottery of life. “Then, without further ado, Hannah Lowery, will you be mine?”
Her lips pull into the purest smile I’ve seen from her, and then she says the most beautiful words I’ve ever heard. “Only yours, Grey.”Only mine.
Chapter 35 – Hannah
Laying on the beach wrapped up in each other is nice. The weather is beautiful for this kind of thing. The breeze lightly blows through the cabana, causing the curtains to flutter. His hand sinks back into my hair, cupping the back of my head, opening and closing his hand, giving me the most delicious scalp massage. “There’s never a shortage of surprises with you, is there? You ran away and quit your job in a two-week timeframe.” I chuckle at the ridiculousness of the situation. It was random from one angle, but from another, it was a long time coming.
“I think, just like you, there was a lot coming at me from every direction over a short amount of time. It kind of blew up all at once. But I don’t regret the job change. I still get to write when it comes to press releases, but I get to make a difference, and I love that.”
“If you could do anything in the world, what would it be?” He asks. I don’t even have to think about my answer.
“I’d get paid to have a never-ending supply of books and coffee, then never leave my bed.” His eyes crinkle as he chuckles. I never had a fairy tale romance, a big group of friends, or a big loving family, so I lived vicariously through the characters in my books. And to be honest, they’ve provided me comfort that I haven’t found anywhere else. I get to experience things in their life without having the heartbreak on my own. I get to experience love in their happily ever after. A good book has never let me down.
“Speaking of books, have you started the one I got you yet?” A blush creeps over my face as I grab my bag, pulling out my book. He sees where my bookmark is, and his mouth falls open. A smile pulls at the corners, making him look like the Hamburgler. “You’ve read that much since this morning, or is that where you randomly put the bookmark?”
I tuck a loose piece of hair behind my ear and look down at the book, my teeth finding my bottom lip. “I may have read half of it already...”
His head falls back, and he laughs, “Okay, well, I wanted to read it together, but apparently, you’re a little speed reader.” LE GASP! My hand flies to my chest. Did I just hear that right?! He wanted to read a book together. Not just any book, a book I told him about in July.
“Greyson Wilder, are you trying to get me to propose to you right now?!” My eyes widen as a smile slowly stretches across his face, my cheeks heating as the words I just said settle in.
Awkward. “Uhh... I mean.”
“Hannah, if you think you’ll be the one proposing, let go of that idea right now. Because I will straight up say no just so that I can propose to you.” Are we really talking about this right now? I am so uncomfortable but so happy at the same time.
“Okay, okay, no proposing, but do you really want to read this together? Because that would be a dream.”
He smiles that big, beautiful smile that makes my heart so happy. “Yeah, I bought myself one too.” He pulls a copy of the exact same book out from behind one of the pillows.
“Want me to read it to you?” I ask softly.
He looks at me and nods, “Or I can catch up to where you are, and we can read it together next week.”
I take the book from his hand and open it to the beginning, “No, it’s okay. I’ll start at the beginning. We can go on this journey together.” A man who wants to do something I likefor the sole purpose of spending time together, where has he been all my life?
We spend the next hour reading; when the sun goes down, he pulls out his phone and turns the flashlight on, holding it so I can see the words on the page. If my heart weren’t already galloping like the beautiful Appaloosas in this book, it would have taken off the second that light turned on. I’ve been leaning against him this whole time; I can’t ignore how right it feels to be near him. To be touching him, it’s like my body comes alive the second we're close. I’m not mad about it.
“Okay, so let me get this straight... They were neighbors when they were younger; they decide they have feelings for each other, kiss a little, then her mom ups and moves them away from her abusive dad in the middle of the night, and they don’t speak to each other again for over a decade?”
“Yeah, but isn't that sweet? I bet their love story is going to be epic. I mean, they have to end up together, right?! Oh, holy cannoli, I need to read the last page of the book, or I’m going to die of anticipation.” I start to flip to the back of the book, but he stops me by placing his hands over mine to stop me.
“No, we’re going on the journey together, remember? Let’s watch how the story unfolds. Please, it’ll be our thing.” I pull my cheek in between my teeth and give it a small bite; this man is so adorable it hurts. “Do I need to keep your book with me so you don’t spoil it for yourself?”