Page 106 of Claiming the Mafia Queen
“You are my whole life,” he whispers sweetly, tickling my ear. “And the thought of leaving you, and the kids behind is the darkest thought I’ve ever had…”
A nod and my lip quivers.… I’m soaking his shirt with tears now.
None of it’s fair. I want to be with him forever.
I wouldn’t have married him if I didn’t want that…
That was the plan….That wasalwaysthe plan.
“I love you …” My voice breaks. I thought I wanted to see this side of him. I thought I wanted to hear that he was scared. I thought I wanted more than just light hearted jabs and stupid jokes, which is what he’s done the entire time he’s been sick. I thought I wanted him to be serious. I thought I wanted to see that he does give a damn if he’s dying or not.
But that’s not what I want at all…
It’s in that moment that I realize all that I really want…
I just want my husband not to die…
“I love you,” I tell him again as he walks me over to the bed. I bite my bottom lip, nervously. "Can I tellyoua secret?" I whisper, my eyes closed.
“Anything." I feel his arms cradle me as I sink onto the bed softly.
"I — I don’t want to fall asleep,” I stammer, He holds me tightly as he lays next to me. ”Because if I close my eyes, I'm afraid I won’t wake up to you smiling…” My eyes flutter open again and he’s staring at me, his lips turned up in a smirk.
He nods and throws his arm over my chest. I lay my head down on his shoulder, my heart torn in two. There’s so much dread I have…
There’s so much worry…
Incurable.
That word keeps playing in my mind, over and over and over.
“And if for some reason you don’t wake up to see me smiling, I want you to think about my smile when you’re sad…or angry… or confused…” he whispers, softly. “Because I’ll always be smiling at you, Aria…”
I don’t know what to do. He’s really dying.
He’s leaving me.
“I can see it…” He snuggles close. “The confusion, the fear, the hurt…” He places a single kiss between my brows.
I shake my head. “You don’t know what you see…”
“I see everything…”
“You don’t …and you don’t need to be talking so final…”
"I'm sick, Aria…”
"I know that!” I hiss, still trying to be as quiet as I can to not wake the kids.
His eyes are wide with fear. “Ready for bed..?”
“No…” I grumble.
He smirks and pulls me closer just before laying a tender kiss on my forehead.
“Goodnight, Aria…” he says. “You’ll wake up to me smiling…”
He was right…